In fact, Gowen did a study of girls who had older boyfriends, and she found that freshmen girls who dated junior or senior boys were more likely to go further, and to be forced into doing things they didn't want to do.
A good rule of thumb is not to date anyone who is more than one grade ahead of you, Choate says.
Before you ask out the object of your affection, or say, "yes" to someone who's interested in you, go through this checklist of questions to make sure you're ready to handle whatever might happen in your new relationship.
Kris Gowen, Ph D, Ed M, a researcher in sexual and mental health at the Portland State University School of Social Work. When you encounter a sad moment, what would you do? If you found someone's wallet and there was a 0 bill inside, what would you do with it? What is the most dangerous thing you have ever done? Which is your favourite asset/body part on a man/woman and why? If our relationship doesnt work out, do you think we can remain friends? Can you think of something you craved for when you were young and were denied? If you could do any job you wanted to, what would it be? If you had to choose, would you rather be rich or famous? What is the funniest thing that has ever happened to you? What holiday do you enjoy the most and how do you celebrate it? What do you think is the most important thing in your life? Is taking a pen or scratch pad from work considered stealing? If you had to pick a car to describe you which one would it be? The one argument your parents had, that you would try and avoid with your partner? What upsets you most in a relationship and what makes you the happiest? If someone told you they saw me with another guy, what would your first reaction be? What's the best piece of advice anyone has ever given you? What's the craziest dare you've ever gone through with? If you could live anywhere other than here, where would it be and why? What do you think is the most important value in a relationship or friendship?"Just because a girl looks like she's 16 when she's only 11, it doesn't mean that psychologically or emotionally she's ready to date older boys...they are so much more skilled at this dating game than she would be, and they can manipulate her and hurt her," says Laura Choate, Ed D, a licensed professional counselor, associate professor of counselor education at Louisiana State University, and author of the book, Girls' and Women's Wellness: Contemporary Counseling Issues and Interventions. If you were asked whom you would like to be born again as, what would your answer be? Random Questions to Ask A Guy 1000 Questions to Ask your Boyfriend What kind of music do you like best? If you won the lottery, what would you buy with the money?She's also written a book about sexuality for teens, called Sexual Decisions: The Ultimate Teen Guide.Gowen says being ready to go out has more to do with your maturity than your age. For one thing, could you tell the person you're dating how far you're willing to take the relationship, and what your sexual boundaries are?"There's a big difference between a seventh-grader and a ninth-grader when it comes to experimentation," Gowen says.By the time they're in high school, guys may have gone a lot further than you're ready to go.