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Though my wife used to enjoy the occasional simulated rape.

How many times have you masturbated in 2011 (and if it counts as the same question, what were you thinking about) Me: 2.

Me: Swear away, but try to keep it thematically relevant, well timed, and above all creative.

I hope he contracts a painful sexual disease and his penis falls off.

While we’re on the subject – is your ass actually tight? I will tell you that i have been blessed in the three areas men care about most – legs, ass, breasts, but anyway, moving on…. They showed promise, but again I’ve not really had a good look Her: You are terrible. Get a load of this text game as it escalates to full on depravity. How come your facebook updates always make you look like a nutjob? Background is: she was a five minute number close at trafalgar square about 3 months ago and though we’ve had some lively banter by text she hasn’t agreed to a date and she hasn’t “crossed the sexual rubicon” of admitting sexual attraction to me. But since i had my heart broken repeatedly by the same cunt and had it smashed around and then began to piece it back together only for him to swoop in a slide it around on the floor again…. But i am sorry, he does not deserve any other word. And now it has happened to me i am a bit more contrite about my horrific abusive behaviour. That’s what losers do when they can’t get it for free. Im not jealous of hookers i just don’t like the thought of him with anyone but me! The window will snap shut after and I’ll be the cocky arsehole again. Very unpleasant for 3 months and not a whole load of laughs another year longer. Her: I will answer anything come on u can ask me 3 Me: Met 1999, married 2006, divorced 2009. Feminist ideology aside, do you enjoy being dominated in bed? What’s the sexual thing you most thought about but haven’t had the courage to try? Answer THOSE badboys Her: Reall number, and its something i am not proud of at all… 3 were long term relationships and the rest were friends of mine who it seemed like a good idea to sleep with… With and also how many times a day on average you play with your…

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