So you're a single midlife woman and you care about sex? And no, I'm not just talking about women who are looking for casual fun, although that's a perfectly acceptable choice.I'm talking about sexually charged woman who believes that good sex is a vital component of a romantic relationship and doesn't want to settle for anything less.Since I've become intentionally sexually transparent in my dating profile, I haven't met any douchebags. Men like my profile because they know where they stand. My marriage ended for many reasons, but sexual incompatibility was at the top of the list. If you want to write a sexually transparent profile, go for it.The last thing I want, at 51, is another relationship in which I can't be myself sexually -- or to spend time with someone hoping that the sex will get better, then being disappointed when it doesn't. If a grown man is going to lose respect for me because I'm transparent about sex, then he isn't someone I want to be with anyway. The guy (or guys) you're meant to be with will appreciate it and you don't need to be concerned about the other ones anyway.A lack of sex in a marriage, however, can turn couples into buddies or quasi-roommates and make that special spark even harder to ignite.Men’s tendency to cheat on the women they date and even have strong feelings for is one of the most common and the most painful issues that women have to deal with in their relationships with guys.Women are socialized to believe that men are jerks and men resent women scrutinizing them for covert jerkiness.
Even though it is impossible to fully protect and “insure” yourself from being cheated on, I strongly believe that understanding the reasons behind this common sexual behavior of a typical, modern man in a western society is important for one major reason: it will help you, as a woman, handle yourself and the situation much better if your current or future partner does end up having an affair and cheating you, by making it easier for you to decide whether you should give it another chance and forgive the guy who cheated or whether you should break your relationship off and never look back.
For some men this stage of life is short, and by late 20’s or early 30’s they “snap” out of it.
Other guys continue to play the field for much longer or even for the rest of their active lives.
You have one shot -- a fleeting shot, given the cyber candy store otherwise known as online dating -- to make yourself stand out.
But you don't want to stand out to everyone; you just want to stand out to the type of person who shares your values -- sexual and otherwise.