Through high school, college and his twenties, he was always The Guy With A Girlfriend.
He spent years enjoying pitying his single friends, and somehow, he’s now 30 and single.
The Misogynist doesn’t know a whole lot about the other gender, but he can tell you the exact number of them he’s slept with—214.
He did quite well with girls back in his earlier days when many were in their attracted to assholes phase, but lately, only those with the lowest self-esteem seem to gravitate towards him.
Now it’s seven years later, his hair got bored and left, and his high school lacrosse glory isn’t part of the conversation that much these days.
And he’s noticing that girls like his ex-girlfriend don’t seem to be all that into him anymore.
Realizing this about five years after everyone else, he takes a deep sigh and cranks his standards down a few big notches.
There was a field that needed to be played, and he broke up with his girlfriend when he was 24.It’s hard enough finding someone to be your life partner, and this guy’s parents are really not making things any easier.He tried to rebel briefly, but after his last girlfriend was not allowed in his parents’ house, causing her to cry, he gave up on that.The Total Package has a hell of a career going, but don’t you for a second suggest that The Total Package would be a workaholic—The Total Package is a family man.There’s just one thing The Total Package seems to be having a hard time finding—a girl worthy of his greatness.He appreciates all the unsolicited support, but he also thinks it would be pretty great if everyone stopped thinking there was something wrong with him.The opposite of the previous guy, The Aggressively Online Dating Guy Who Can’t Believe He’s Not Married Yet can’t believe he’s not married yet.The Misogynist’s close cousin is The Perpetual Cheater. Back in the day, The Guy Who Peaked Too Early had everything a 17-year-old girl could ever dream of.His sky-high confidence carried him smoothly through college, and no one was surprised when he landed a smart, sweet, beautiful girlfriend in his early 20s.He’d also really appreciate it if his mother would stop setting him up on dates.The Misogynist hates women, and women hate The Misogynist.